Using Diplomatic Language

Educational Support Officer, Kevin Kennedy

Negotiating and dealing with problems professionally is difficult for non-native English speakers. Many believe that there is just a list of diplomatic-sounding words that one could study. But this is not enough.

In British culture, politeness is indispensable. Thus, being diplomatic in English means using indirect rather than straight-talking language. That said, this will vary from culture to culture, with Americans speaking far more directly. Nonetheless, the following techniques should be used when negotiating, making objections & suggestions or when blaming someone. 

Diplomatic Techniques

Softeners: are words and phrases that make news sound less harsh. Compare the two versions of each sentence. 

The second sentences still convey the necessary information but doesn’t put the onus on any one person. 

Modal Verbs: are a huge help to respectfully give an order or make a request. Compare the following sentences. 

Making a Request 

“I want/need more staff.”

This is a far too direct sentence that would be seen as very demanding. 

“I could do with some more staff.” or “It would be beneficial to have more staff.” 

A much more respectable tone with a modal verb, as it implies who you are asking, can deny if they wish. 

Giving an Order 

“Give me the report by tomorrow.”

This is perceived as sounding quite rude. 

“Could you give me that report by tomorrow?”

The second sentence invites the other person to raise any issue that may prevent them from completing it by tomorrow. 

Rephrasing negative sentences

“I’m afraid I haven’t finished that task.” 

While the use of ‘I’m afraid’ softens the bad news, it gives no explanation.

“I’m afraid I’ve not been able to finish that task yet.”

By using ‘be able’ you indicate that your attempt to complete the task was stopped by circumstances out of your control. So, while there has been a failure, it is not because of you alone. Also, the use of ‘yet’ emphasises that it will be done as soon as possible. 

Furthermore, negative sentences with can’t or won’t make the speaker sound especially uninterested, unhelpful and pessimistic.

There are many more examples and aspects of being diplomatic in English. If you wish to learn more our course English for Professional Communication goes into the topic in much greater detail.